Profession Jokes

Going to the Doctors

There was this guy who was sick so he went to the doctor. The doc ran some tests and sent him home with some medicine. The next day the doctor called and the wife answered. "I'm going to have to run a few more tests," the doctor said. "I'm going to need a semen, urine and a fecal sample." After she hung up, the husband asked, "What did the doctor say?" "Oh the doctor is going to need a pair of your underwear."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Buy the Mule!

A man was traveling down a country road when he saw a large group of people outside a house. He stopped and asked a person why the large crowd was there. A farmer replied, "Joe's mule kicked his mother-in-law and she died." "Well," replied the man, "she must have had a lot of friends." "Nope," said the farmer, "we all just want to buy his mule."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Get Away with Murder

Two prisoners are talking about their crimes:
George: "I robbed a bank, and they gave me 20 years"
Herman: "Hmm. I killed a man, and I'm here for 3 days"
George: "*WHAT*??? I rob a bank and get 20 years; you kill a man and get 3 days???"
Herman: "Yeah, it was a lawyer."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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