Word Play Jokes

Elevator V Mexican

Q: What is the difference between a Mexican and an Elevator?
A: The elevator can raise a child.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Scholarly Discussion

A stranger was seated next to Little Johnny on the plane when the the stranger turned to the Little Johnny and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger." Little Johnny, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said to the stranger "What would you like to discuss?" "Oh, I don't know," said the stranger. "How about nuclear power?" "OK," said Little Johnny. "That could be an interesting topic, but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?" "Jeez," said the stranger. "I have no idea." "Well, then," said Little Johnny, "How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know sh*t?"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Baby Bear's New Living

One day mama bear and papa bear were getting a divorce. The judge decided that baby bear was going to live with mama bear. Baby bear started to cry. "Whats wrong?" the judge asked baby bear. "I don't want to live with mama bear, she abuses me!" said baby bear. "Then, you can live with papa bear" said the judge. Baby bear started to cry even harder the judge asked him, "What's wrong?" Baby bear replied, "I don't want to live with papa bear he abuses me even more than mama bear does." "Then who do you want to live with?" asked the judge. Baby bear replied, "I want to live with the Chicago Bears, because they don't beat anyone!"

Anonymous
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