Football Flood

Q: What should a football team do if the pitch is flooded?
A: Bring on their subs!

Tyson's Upcoming Fight

Q: Did you know that Mike Tyson has an upcoming fight with Prince Charles?
A: It seems that no-one else has big enough ears to go 12 rounds.

His Private Dresser Drawer

A young couple gets married, and the groom asks his bride if he can have a dresser drawer of his own that she will never open. The bride agrees. After 30 years of marriage, she notices that his drawer has been left ajar. She peeks in and sees 3 golf balls and $6,000. She confronts her mate with her findings, and asks for an explanation. He explains "Every time I was unfaithful to you, I put a golf ball in the drawer." She figures 3 times in 30 years isn't bad. But what about the $6,000? He explains "Whenever I got a dozen golf balls, I sold 'em!"