Typical Women Quotes

1. So many men, so few can afford me.
2.  If they don't have chocolate in heaven, I'm not going.
3. My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips.
4. Coffee, chocolate, men... some things are just better rich.
5. Don't treat me any differently than you would the queen
6. Next mood swing: 6 minutes.
7. Of course I don't look busy... I did it right the first time.
8. Do not start with me, you will not win.
9. How can I miss you if you won't go away?
10. If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen!

In The Forest

If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?

Two Emotions

Men have two emotions, hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.