Making Coffee

Making a cup of coffee is like making love to a beautiful woman. It's got to be hot.  You've got to take your time. You've got to stir gently, and firmly. You've got to grind your beans until they squeak. And then you put in the milk.

Brunettes and Implants

Q: Why don't brunettes get breast implants?
A: They've already spent their money on thigh & butt implants.-

Make Me Feel Like A Woman

A man and a woman are on an elevator at the top of the world's tallest building, when all of a sudden, the cable snaps and the elevator starts plummeting to the ground. The emergency brakes don't work, the emergency phone doesn't work, and they both begin to panic. The woman screams "We're going to die!", rips of all her clothes, throws herself on the floor and says to the man "make me feel like a woman again!" So, he pulls off his jacket, throws it on the floor, and says "pick that up, bitch."