Sex Jokes

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Jewish Names

A widowed Jewish lady, still in good shape, was sunbathing on a mostly deserted beach at Stimson Beach. She looked up and noticed that a man her age, also in good shape, had walked up, placed his blanket on the sand near hers and began reading a book. Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him.  "How are you today?" "Fine, thank you," he responded, and turned back to his book. "I love the beach.  Do you come here often?" she asked. "First time since my wife passed away two years ago," he replied and turned back to his book. "I'm sorry to hear that.  My husband passed away three years ago and it is very lonely," she countered.  "Do you live around here?" She asked. "Yes, I live over in San Francisco," he answered, and again he resumed reading. Trying to find a topic of common interest, she persisted, "Do you like pussy cats?" With that, the man dropped his book, came over to her blanket, tore off her swimsuit and gave her the most passionate lovemaking of her life. When the cloud of sand began to settle, she gasped and asked the man, "How did you know that was what I wanted?"

The man replied,  "How did you know my name was Katz?"

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Word Play Jokes , Religion Jokes (Jewish Jokes) , Sex Jokes
Anonymous

Senior Sex

An old woman in a Nursing Home looks up one day to find an elderly man looking down on her. She smiled and asked him what he wanted. "To get straight to the point, I know we are old and can no longer pleasure in sexual activity, but I was wondering if you would help me." "Of course," she smiled. "I was wondering if we could take a wander down to the park and if your could hold my penis for a while." The old woman saw no harm in it, so she agreed. Since then they made it a regular occurrence, and every day the two elderly people sat on the park bench and she held his penis. One day, the woman went to the bench, but the man was not there. Feeling hurt, she looked around for him. To her amazement, she saw him and another woman- SHE was holding his penis! "What does SHE have that I don't?" She screeched. He looked up at her and smiled. "Parkinsons" he replied.

Categories: Old Age Jokes (Old Age Sex Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Private Parts) , Sexist Jokes (Men vs Women Jokes) , Disability Jokes (Mentally Challenged Jokes) , Dark Humor Jokes
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Anonymous

Geek Booty Call - Life

If you're looking for intelligent life, it's right here. In my pants.

Categories: Sex Jokes (Booty Call Jokes) , Word Play Jokes
Anonymous
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