More Signs You Are Out of College

• Your refrigerator holds more solid foods than liquids.
• You've lost the thread on your favorite soap opera.
• 8 a.m. means shower and shave, not wake and bake.
• You file taxes with more than three digits.
• You hear your favorite songs in doctor's waiting rooms and when you're on hold with the bank.
• You're not carded anymore for anything.
• You carry an umbrella.
• You now know there's no such thing as "looking mature."
• You get your news from sources other than ESPN and MTV.
• Wine appreciation expands beyond Boone's and Mad Dog.
• Doing shots and smoking cigarettes guarantees midnight dry heaves and a sinus attack instead of midnight skinny dipping and a Big Mac attack.
• You go from 130 days to seven days of vacation time.
• You actually eat breakfast foods -- at breakfast time.

You Might Be A College Student

• If you average 3 hours of sleep a night
• If your trash is overflowing and your bank account isn't
• If you go to Wal-Mart more than 3 times a week
• If you are personally keeping the local pizza place from bankruptcy
• If you wake up 10 minutes before class
• If you wear the same jeans 13 days in a row -- without washing them
• If your breakfast consists of a coke on the way to class
• If your social life consists of a date with the library
• If it takes a shovel to find the floor of your room
• If you carry less than a dollar on your person
• If you haven't done laundry in so long you are wearing your swim suit to class
• If you celebrate when you find a quarter
• If your room is so cold that your toilet freezes over
• If you wear a sweat suit for so long that it stands up by itself
• If your backpack is giving you Scoliosis
• If you get more sleep in class than in your room
• If your idea of feeding the poor is buying yourself some Ramen Noodles
• If you can sleep through your roommate's blaring stereo
• If you live in an area that is smaller than most mobile homes
• If you get more e-mail than mail

Getting Bad

It's been getting bad out there. College grads are unemployed and can't get work. I saw a college grad selling their BA degree on eBay.