What Am I?

Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is."

Holy Feet

Q: What kind of shoes did Jesus wear?
A: Cross-trainers.

Jewish Female President

The first Jewish woman President is elected. She calls her Mother: "Mama, I've won the elections, you've got to come to the swearing- in ceremony." "I don't know, what would I wear?" "Don't worry, I'll send you a dressmaker" "But I only eat kosher food" "Mama, I am going to be the president, I can get you kosher food" "But how will I get there?" "I'll send a limo, just come mama" "Ok, Ok, if it makes you happy. The great day comes and Mama is seated between the Supreme Court Justices and the Future Cabinet members, she nudges the gentleman on her right. "You see that girl, the one with her hand on the Bible?"... "Her brother's a doctor!"