Hotel Jesus

Jesus walks into an inn, hands the innkeeper three nails, and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"

The Test

The Emperor of Japan advertises for a new bodyguard. Three swordsmen apply: one is Japanese, one is Chinese, and one is Jewish. To test him, the Emperor lets a fly loose in the room and tells the Chinese swordsman to kill it. The swordsman sweeps down his blade and chops the fly in two. The Japanese swordsman is given the same test. He swings his sword twice and manages to cut the fly into quarters before it hits the ground. The Jewish swordsman is then given a fly. He chases it around the room, swings his sword a few times, then sits down with the fly buzzing around his head. “Why have you stopped?” asks the Emperor. “The fly is still alive. ”“Yes,” replies the Jewish swordsman. “But now it’s circumcised.”

Sky Divers' Wishes

Three sky divers were diving but their parachutes were faulty and they all died. They went to heaven and there before those three men stood God. "Go down the slide and you will receive one wish. What you wish for is what you get at the end of the slide," boomed God's voice. The first man slid down and said, "SPORTS CAR," and sure enough there was a sports car. The second man went down and said, "MONEY," and he received money. The third man jumped down the slide and said, "WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"