Why wasn't Jesus born in West Virginia?

Why wasn't Jesus born in West Virginia? Well God found plenty of guys who liked to deal with sheep, but he couldn't find three wise men or a virgin.

Lady Di at Heavens Gates

Lady Di is welcomed at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter. Peter asks: "Oh dear, what happened to you?" Di answers: "I died in a car crash, but wait till you see my friend, he looks much worse." Half an hour later Dodi shows up and St. Peter says: "My God, you look terrible." Dodi replies: "This is nothing. Wait till you see my driver." Half an hour later some bones and flesh move slowly to the Gates, and St. Peter says: "So you're the driver?" "No, I'm Mother Theresa."

Conversion

A Jewish lawyer was troubled by the way his son turned out and went to see his Rabbi about it. "I brought him up in the faith, gave him a very expensive bar mitzvah, and it cost me a fortune to educate him. Then he tells me last week he has decided to be a Christian. Rabbi, where did I go wrong". 
"Funny you should come to me," said the Rabbi. "Like you, I, too, brought my boy up in the faith, put him through University, cost me a fortune, then one day he comes and tells me he has decided to become a Christian".  "What did you do?",  asked the lawyer.  "I turned to God for the answer," replied the rabbi.  "And what did he say?"  He said, "Funny you should come to me..."