Relationship Jokes - Marriage Jokes

Break In

"Get this." said the bloke to his mates, "Last night while I was down at the pub with you guys, a burglar broke into my house." "Did he get anything." his mates asked. "Yeah! A broken jaw, six teeth knocked out, and a pair of busted nuts. The wife thought it was me coming home drunk."

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Anonymous

Young Immigrant Couple

The young immigrant couple had just left the courthouse after being sworn in as American citizens. "It is wonderful," the husband exclaimed. "We are American citizens at last! Do you know what this means to us my dear wife?" "Yes, you male chauvinist pig," his wife replied. "Tonight, you cook dinner and I get on top!"

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Anonymous

Magic Starch

Grandpa and Billy were working out in the garden, Grandpa spies Billy trying to put a worm back into the ground. "You'll never get that worm back in his hole," said the old man. Suddenly, Billy had an idea. He ran into the laundry room and came back with a can of spray starch. After a few sprays, the worm was as stiff as a board and Billy was able to slide him back into the earth. "Billy! You're a genius," exclaimed Grandpa. He hugged Billy, gave him a dollar out of his pocket, grabbed the starch, and ran inside. Thirty minutes later, Grandpa comes back out smiling. He gives Billy another dollar. "Grandpa," said the boy, "You already gave me a dollar." "No," replied Grandpa, "That dollar's from grandma!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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