Relationship Jokes

Nothing To Eat

A woman walks into a tattoo parlor. She gets into the chair and tells the tattoo artist, "I want two tattoos, one on each of my inner thighs. I want a turkey on one thigh and a Christmas tree on the other." The tattoo artist begins his work, but is a bit confused, so he says, "Lady, I'll do anything my customers want, but I gotta ask, why would you want a turkey on one thigh and a Christmas tree on the other?" "Well, if you really want to know," she firmly answers, "I'm sick and tired of my husband telling me that there's never anything to eat between the holidays."

Anonymous

Chest Hair

A woman asks her husband to buy her a fur coat for their 25th anniversary. "HA!" he snorted. "The day I buy you a fur coat will be the day you can grow hair on your chest!" On that she hikes up her skirt, drops her panties, and thrust her pubic area forward, "There! I have hair on my chest, now buy me the damn coat!" "That's not your chest!" he roars back. "Damn right it's my chest!" she argued. "Before we got married, this was your hope chest. On our honeymoon it was your treasure chest. Afterwards it became our family chest AND IF YOU DON'T BUY ME A FUR COAT IT WILL SOON BECOME THE COMMUNITY CHEST!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Say Anything

Personally I think one of the greatest things about marriage is that as both husband and Father, I can say anything I want to around the house and of course, no one pays the least bit of attention.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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