Wishful Thinking

You know you're getting old when you back is the only thing that is stiff when you wake up in the morning.

Old Never Dies

Old canners never die, they are preserved.
Old cars never die, they just get run into the ground.
Old cashiers never die, they just check out.
Old chauffers never die, they just lose their drive.
Old chemists never die, they just do it inorganically.
Old chemists never die, they just fail to react.
Old chemists never die, they just lose their refluxes.
Old chemists never die, they just reach equilibrium.
Old chemists never die, they just smell that way.
Old cleaning people never die, they just kick the bucket.
Old composers never die, they just decompose.
Old computer people never die, they just lose their memory.
Old computer programmers never die, they just byte the dust.
Old cooks never die, they just get deranged.
Old couriers never die, they just keep on expressing it!

Arch Out

I used to do yoga, but their expectations of me were too high
They wanted me to bend over backwards for them