Penguins are Different

Q: Why do penguins live in the Arctic?
A: Because they can't fly to Florida like the rest of the old birds.

At the Dentist

An old lady went to visit her dentist. When it was her turn, she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants, and raised her legs.
The dentist said, “Excuse me, but I’m not a gynecologist.”
“I know,” said the old lady. “I want you to take my husband’s teeth out.”

The Name is Rose

It seems that this old couple are having trouble remembering things, so they sign up for a memory course. The course is wonderful; they come home and tell all their relatives, friends, and neighbors about it. Some months later, a neighbor approaches the man as he tends the garden. Neighbor asks, "Say, Ed, what was the name of the instructor of that memory course you liked so much?" Ed replies, "Well, it was...hmmm...let me think a minute... What's the name of that flower, you know, the one that smells so nice, but has thorns on the stems...? Neighbor says, "You mean a rose?" Ed replies, "Yeah, that's it!...(shouting toward house) Hey, Rose, what was the memory course instructor's name?