Chance to be Healed

A deaf man, a blind man and a disabled man heard a rumor that God came down to a mountaintop to solve people's problems. They all went to find out if it was true. God asked the deaf man, "Can I help you, son?" The man signed that he would be so happy if he could get his hearing back. God touched the man and suddenly he could hear. God then touched the blind man and he was able to see. The third man was sitting in his wheelchair with his mouth wide open in amazement. God looked at the man and asked him what he wanted. The man drew back and yelled, "Don't lay one finger on me. I'm on disability!"

Tax Refund

I know you're missin' the beach but you're missin' a tooth and all the tread on your tires too. Let's make a smart decision this year with your tax refund.

Jewish Football Game

Q: What's the object of a Jewish football game?
A: To get the quarter back!