Rowboat

A kid I know lost both his parents in an accident. To take his mind off it for a while, I took him on a boating trip. I wanted to get a boat with an engine, but he wanted to row.
"Ah" I said "You're an oar fan"

When to Wean

Q: What is the best time to wean the baby from nursing?
A: When you see teeth marks.

All The Right Answers

Did you hear about the 10 year old boy who asked his recently divorced mother her age? She told him that was not a question to ask and that he shouldn't ask it again. He then asked her her weight. She, once again, told him that she wouldn't answer the question and that he shouldn't ask it again. The next question he asked was why she and Daddy got divorced. Once again, she told him that it was not a question he should ask and to not ask that question again. He went away. A few minutes later, she found him digging in her purse. She asked what he was doing and as he turn toward his mother, he beamingly told her he had found all the answers to his questions by looking at her driver's license. He said, "Mother, you're 34 years old, weigh 125 pounds and Daddy divorced you because you got an 'F' in sex."