Jokes about Families

Who Owns the Cows?

After his graduation from college, the son of a Spanish lawyer was considering his future. He went to his father and asked if he might be given a desk in the corner from which he could observe his father’s activities and be introduced to his father’s clients as a clerk. His observations would help him decide whether or not to become a lawyer. His father thought this was a great idea and immediately helped to set it up. The first client the next morning was a tenant farmer--a rough man with calloused hands who was dressed in workman’s clothing. He said, "Mr. Lawyer, I work for the Gonzales farm on the east side of town. For many years I have tended their crops and animals, including some cows. I have raised the cows, fed them and looked after them. And I was always given the understanding and the belief that I was the owner of these cows. Now Mr. Gonzales has died and his son has inherited the farm. He believes that since the cows were raised on his land and ate his hay, the cows are his. In short, we are in dispute over who owns the cows." The lawyer said, "Thank you. I have heard enough. I will take your case. Don't worry about the cows!" The next client to come in, a young and well-dressed young man, was obviously a landowner. He said, "My name is Gonzales and I own a farm on the east side of town. We have a tenant farmer who has worked for my family for many years, tending crops and the animals, including some cows. I believe the cows belong to me because they were raised on my land and were fed my hay. But the tenant farmer believes they are his because he raised them and cared for them. In short, we are in dispute over who owns the cows." The lawyer said, "Thank you. I have heard enough. I will take your case. Don't worry about the cows!" After the client left, the lawyer’s son could not help but express his concern. "Father, I know very little about the law, but it seems we have a very serious problem concerning these cows." "Don’t worry about the cows!" the lawyer said. "The cows will be ours!"

Categories: Jokes about Families (Father Jokes) , Profession Jokes (Farmer Jokes) , Profession Jokes (Lawyer Jokes) , Ethnic / Country Jokes
Anonymous

Breaking the News

A guy is just getting back from a long business trip out of the country. He’d left his cat with his brother. As soon as he’s back at the airport, he calls his brother and asks about the cat. “The cat’s dead,” the brother says. The guy is devastated. “Hey, that cat meant a lot to me. Don’t you know any better than to break bad news like that? Jeez. You ought to say, ‘Well, the cat got out on the roof, and the fire department came. They put up the ladder, but the cat was afraid to let go. It was cold outside, and finally when they were able to get up there the cat had passed away from exposure.’ You know, break it gently.” “Man, I’m sorry,” the brother says. “I’ll do a better job next time.” “Okay. Anyway, what’s really important is family. How have you been all this time? How’s Mom?” “Well,” the brother says. “Mom got out on the roof..."

Categories: Animal Jokes (Cat Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Brother Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes)
Submitted BY: JackD

Crow Vision

My mom has crows feet in the corner of her eyes.
They really don't suit her. I told her she was too old for a facial tattoo.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Old Age Jokes , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Word Play Jokes
Copyright © 2015 - Kiel Phillips - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Written By: KielPhillips
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