Women and Bowling

Q: Why do women prefer sex over bowling?
A: Because the balls are lighter and you don't have to change your shoes.

Black Dog

Q: When is a black dog not a black dog?
A: When it's a greyhound!

Food For Thought

• "If we don't change the direction we're going, we're likely to end up at the wrong end."
• "People who go out of their way to help others have great taste."
• "An eye for an eye leaves everybody blind, but not hungry."
• "Don't give up though the pace seems slow, you may succeed at another morgue."
• "A journey of a hundred trillion cells begins with a single nibble."
• "The only difference between a big shot and a little shot is that the big shot takes longer to chew."
• "It's all right to have little butterflies in your stomach. In fact, I'd say a trip to the elementary school play is a wonderful idea."
• "You don't know what your appetite can get away with until you try. Or are tried."
• "If you carry your childhood with you, you should probably go the bathroom soon."
• "Never keep up with Joneses. Have them over for dinner."
• "Let your hook always be cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be a very startled swimmer."