Circus Horse

A horse walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, scotch on the rocks please!" The bartender, rubbing his eyes in disbelief says, "Did.. did you just talk?" "Yes I did, why?" "It's just incredible! I've never seen a talking horse! You know, you should really go talk to the local circus, they would LOVE to have someone with your skills!"
The horse replied "Why? Are they short on electricians?"

Little Mermaid Undergarments

Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra (algae-bra)?

Top Ten Things A Cat Thinks About

1. I could have sworn I heard the can opener.
2. Is there something I'm not getting when humans make noise with their mouths?
3. Why doesn't the government do something about dogs?
4. I wonder if Morris really liked 9-Lives, or did he have ULTERIOR motives?
5. Hmmm ... If dogs serve humans, and humans serve cats, why can't we cats ever get these STUPID dogs to do anything for us?
6. This looks like a good spot for a nap.
7. Hey -- no kidding, I'm sure that's the can opener.
8. Would humans have built a vast and complex civilization of their own if we cats hadn't given them a reason to invent sofas and can openers in the first place?
9. If there's a God, how can He allow neutering?
10. If that really was the can opener, I'll play finicky just to let THEM know who's boss!