Great School Humor

• "I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book." -- Groucho Marx 1890-1977
• This reminds me of the student who began his Middle Ages story with: "He was a dark and stormy knight...."
• In a survey taken several years ago, all incoming freshman at MIT were asked if they expected to graduate in the top half of their class. Ninety-seven percent responded that they did.
• Q: What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A: The teacher says "Get that gum out of your mouth", where as the train says "Chew, Chew. " 
• "The reason that every major university maintains a department of mathematics is that it is cheaper to do this than to institutionalize all those people." 

Corporate Pickup Line

I'll try not to get any human resources on you.

Knock Knock - Don Juan

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Don Juan!
Don Juan who?
Don Juan to go to school today!