Jokes about Families - Uncle Jokes

Wife's Heart Attack

A guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What's up?" he asks. "I'm having a heart attack!" cries the woman. He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he's dialing, his four-year-old son comes up and says, "Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet, and he's got no clothes on!" He slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife. He rips open the closet door. Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the floor. "You bastard," says the husband. "My wife is having a heart attack, and you're running around with no clothes on scaring the kids!"

Categories: Disease / Afflictions Jokes (Heart Disease Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Cheater Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Uncle Jokes)
Anonymous

Moral of the Story

One day Adam's teacher told the class that everyone must find out a moral for the next day's class. One boy came in and said, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch." The second boy said, "Don't judge a book by it's cover." Then Adam came in with a broken jaw and black eyes and said, "I asked my Uncle Johnny for a moral and he told me to shut up. I told him he had to help me because it was homework." The teacher said, "What is the moral, Johnny?" "DON''T MESS WITH UNCLE JOHNNY WHEN HE'S DRINKING!!!''

Categories: Jokes about Families (Uncle Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Drunk Jokes) , School Jokes
Anonymous

Lives With

Q: What do you call an ant who lives with your great uncle?
A: Your great-ant!

Categories: Animal Jokes (Insect Jokes) , Word Play Jokes , Riddles (Riddles for Kids) , Jokes about Families (Uncle Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Aunt Jokes)
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Anonymous
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