Sex Ed

My teenage daughter came home in a rage. "I just had sex education class in school today, Dad! You lied to me! You told me if I have sex before my sixteenth birthday, my boyfriend will die!" I put down my paper and said, "Oh, he will, sweetheart, he will."

How Many People Work...

One day a boy and his father were at the dining room table working on the boy's Social Studies homework, the chapter about government. The boy turns to his father and asks, "Dad, how many people work in the U.S. government?" The father replies without hesitating, "Oh, about ten percent."

Maybe Later

A young couple bring their new baby home and the wife suggests that her husband try his hand at changing a diaper. “I’m busy,” he says. “I’ll do the next one.” Next time the baby’s diaper needs changing she asks him again. The husband says, “I didn’t mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby.”