Chinaman

Q: What do you call a mentally challenged Chinaman?
A: Sometin Wong.

The Robot Bartender

A popular bar had a new robotic bartender installed. A guy came in for a drink and the robot asked him, "What's your IQ?"  The man replied, "130." So the robot proceeded to make conversation about physics, astronomy, and so on. The man listened intently and thought, "This is really cool."  Another guy came in for a drink and the robot asked him, "What's your IQ?"  The man responded, "110." So the robot started talking about the Super Bowl, dirt bikes, and so on. The man thought to himself, "Wow, this is really cool."  A third guy came in to the bar. As with the others, the robot asked him, "What's your IQ?"  The man replied, "80."  The robot then replied, "So, how are things in Poland these days?"

Irish Couple

An Irish couple, whose married bliss was not without a few "squalls," received a humble lecture from their priest regarding their disgraceful quarrels. "Why, that dog and cat you have agree better than you." The husband replied, "If yer reverence'll tie them together, ye'll soon change yer mind."