Sex Karma

A cheap tourist in a south of the border town known for prostitution picks up a hooker. After paying her, he drives off, shouting back, "El dollar, counterfeito!"
The prostitute smile and shouts back, "El syphilis, originale!"

Bubba and Junior

Two good ol' boys, Bubba and Junior get promoted from Privates to Sergeants. Not long after, they're out for a walk and Bubba says, "Hey, Junior - there's the NCO Club. Let's you and me stop in and have us a drank."
"But we's privates," protests Junior.
"NO, we's sergeants now," says Bubba, pulling him inside. "Now, Junior, I'm gonna sit down and have me a drank."
"But, we's privates," says Junior.
"You blind, boy!" says Bubba, pointing at his stripes. "We's Sergeants now!" So they order their drinks and pretty soon a hooker comes up to Bubba. "You're cute," she says, "and I'd like to take you someplace and make you feel good -- but I've got a bad case of gonorrhea."
Bubba pulls his friend to the side and whispers, "Junior, go look in the dictionary and see what that gonorrhea means. If it's good, give me the okay sign." Junior goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Bubba the big okay sign.
Three weeks later Bubba is laid up in the infirmary with a terrible case of gonorrhea. "Junior," he says, "What you give me the okay for?!"
"Well Bubba, in the dictionary, it says gonorrhea only affects the privates." Then he pointed to his stripes and says, "But we's Sergeants now!

Gynecologist Patient Comprehension Exam

This chick walks into a doctor's office. The nurse tells her to take off her clothes, and that the doctor will be with her in a minute. She obeys.
The doctor walks in and takes off his coat. He begins to feel between her thighs.
Doctor: "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
Woman: "You're checking for menopause."
Doctor: "Very good."
Then, he starts to feel her tits.
Doctor: "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
Woman: "Checking for breast cancer."
Doctor: "Very good."

Then, he jumps on her and penetrates her.
Doctor: "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
Woman: "Contracting genital herpes. That's why I came to see you!"