Michael Jackson's Legos

Have you heard? Michael Jackson’s last wish was that his body be turned into Legos. So little kids can play with him. It turns out this wish hasn’t been difficult to implement, as his body was already 99% plastic.

Don't Jump

A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the roof of his building. Just before the man jumps, the physicist yells: "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"

Wife Down

I woke up this morning at 9:00 and could sense something was wrong. I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing!  I panicked.  I didn't know what to do. Then I remembered, McDonalds serves breakfast all day.