Bar Jokes

Engineer in a Bar

There was a mine in a small town that completely collapsed. One of the engineers who miraculously survived the disaster went into the local watering hole. The bar was empty except for one lonely soul at the other end of the bar.
"Hey bartender," said the Engineer, "I'll have a beer and pour another one for my friend down at the end there."
The bartender responded, "I'm sorry, sir, but that guy's a commie and we don't serve his kind around here."
"Well, you'd better because if it weren't for that guy, I wouldn't be here. You remember that mine that caved in, well I was in that mine and so was that guy. When the last of us were escaping, he held the roof of the mine up with his head! So get him a beer and if you don't believe me, look at the top of his head and you'll see that it's flat from holding the roof up."
The bartender skeptically served the commie his beer and then came back to talk to the Engineer: "I saw the flat spot on his head but I also couldn't help noticing the bruising under his chin. What is that all about?" the Engineer responded, "Oh... that's where we put the jack."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Singles Circus

Q: How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?
A: At the circus the clowns don't talk.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Did You Hear The News

"Did ya hear the news?" asked Keenan of his pal at the saloon. "Harrigan drank so much, his wife left him!" "Bartender! Give me six boilermakers!!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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