Circus Horse

A horse walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, scotch on the rocks please!" The bartender, rubbing his eyes in disbelief says, "Did.. did you just talk?" "Yes I did, why?" "It's just incredible! I've never seen a talking horse! You know, you should really go talk to the local circus, they would LOVE to have someone with your skills!"
The horse replied "Why? Are they short on electricians?"

Jets Dog

A guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender says, "No pets allowed." The man replies, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you'll see. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips." The Jets keep scoring field goals, and the dog keeps flipping and jumping. "Wow! What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?" The man replies, "I don't know. I've only had him for 7 years."

Dingle House

A guy goes to a pet store to buy an unusual pet and walks out with a centipede in a white box. Once he gets it home, the guy decides to take the centipede to his local bar and show it to his drinking buddies. He taps on the box and says, “Would you like to go to the Dingle House with me and have a beer?” There’s no answer from the centipede. He waits a few moments then says, “How about you and me going to a bar?” Again, there’s no answer. Thinking the centipede can’t hear him, the man goes right up to the box and yells, “Hey! Would you like to go to the Dingle House bar and have a drink?!” A little voice comes out of the box, “I heard you the first time! I’m putting on my shoes.”