One Question too Many

A man goes into a bar and admires the stuffed lion’s head mounted on the wall. “What a great trophy,” says the man to the bartender. “I wouldn’t call it great,” replies the bartender. “That damn lion killed my wife.” “Good heavens,” says the man, “were you on safari?” “No,” replies the bartender. “The screws came loose and it fell on her head.”

Circus Horse

A horse walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, scotch on the rocks please!" The bartender, rubbing his eyes in disbelief says, "Did.. did you just talk?" "Yes I did, why?" "It's just incredible! I've never seen a talking horse! You know, you should really go talk to the local circus, they would LOVE to have someone with your skills!"
The horse replied "Why? Are they short on electricians?"

Jets Dog

A guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender says, "No pets allowed." The man replies, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you'll see. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips." The Jets keep scoring field goals, and the dog keeps flipping and jumping. "Wow! What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?" The man replies, "I don't know. I've only had him for 7 years."