Blind Man Seeing

A blind man walks into a bar with his seeing-eye dog. He stands in the center of the bar, takes the dog by the chain, and starts swinging him above his head. Everyone stops and stares. Upset about the way the animal is being treated, a patron runs up to the blind man and demands, "What the hell are you doing?" The blind man turns toward the patron and says, "Oh, nothing, just looking around."

Duck and Rabbi

A duck walks into a bar with a rabbi on his head. "What's the deal?" the bartender asks. The duck says, "It's opposite day."

Goose and Lady in Bar

A lady goes into a bar with her goose. Then the bartender comes up to her and says, "Why did you have to bring the pig in with you?" Then the lady answered, "Excuse me, I think this is a goose." And the bartender says, ''Excuse me, I was talking to the goose.''