Dog Property Laws

1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If its in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
5. If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
6. If its mine, it must never appear to be yours anyway.
7. If it just looks like mine, its mine.
8. If I saw it first, its mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If its broken, its yours.

Fake It

Q: What do you do when a Rottweiler gets amorous on your leg?
A: Fake an orgasm.

Hellen Keller's Leg

Q: Why does Helen Keller have a yellow leg?
A: Her dog is blind also.