Goodbye To Mother

A couple were going out for the evening. They'd got ready, all dolled up, cat put out, etc. The taxi arrives and as the couple got out, the cat shoots back in. They didn't want the cat shut in the house, so the wife went out to the taxi while the husband went upstairs to chase the cat out. The wife, not wanting it known that the house would be empty, explained to the taxi driver, "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother." A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab, "Sorry I took so long", he said, "Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"

Two Fat Robbins

Two robins were sitting in a tree. "I'm really hungry," said the first one. "Me, too" said the second. "Let's fly down and find some lunch." They flew to the ground and found a nice plot of plowed ground full of worms. They ate and ate and ate and ate 'til they could eat no more. "I'm so full I don't think I can fly back up to the tree," said the first one. "Me either. Let's just lay here and bask in the warm sun," said the second. "O.K." said the first. They plopped down, basking in the sun. No sooner had they fallen asleep, a big fat tom cat snuck up and gobbled them up. As he sat washing his face after his meal, he thought... are you ready for this... "I just love baskin' robins!"

Do You Like Pussy Cats

A man walks up to a stranger in the street. "Do you like pussy cats?" said the stranger. "Yeah, I do," said the man. "But how did you know my name was 'Katz?''