Animal Jokes - Bird Jokes

We have tons of funny bird jokes! If it has wings, we can laugh about it. Get hilarious bird jokes on Jokerz.

Lost Echo

A vampire bat flies back into his cave on Halloween night...he has blood all over his face. He perches himself on the roof to try and get some rest. But before too long the other bats smell the blood, and start to gather around him. They ask feverishly where he got the blood from. Knowing that they will not let up till he tells them "Okay, follow me!". He flies out of the cave, across a valley, over a river into a dark forest. Deep in the forest he stops, all the other bats gather round in an excited frenzy. "Okay", says the bat, "see that big oak tree over there?". "Yeah, yeah" reply the other bats, drooling in anticipation. : "Well I sure has hell didn't!" said the bat.

Anonymous

The Computer Dating Site Responds

A hopeful suitor dropped into a computer-dating site and registered his qualifications. He wanted someone who enjoyed water sports, liked company, favored formal attire, and was very small.
The computer operated faultlessly. It sent him a penguin.

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Anonymous

Christmas Parrot

A woman is looking for a Christmas present for her husband. She walks by a pet shop and sees a beautiful parrot. A tag on the cage says $50. “Why so little?” she asks. The store manager says, “This bird used to live in a house of prostitution. It has kind of a vulgar mouth.” The woman decides to buy the parrot anyway. She brings the parrot home and puts his cage near the Christmas tree. First thing the bird says is, “New house, new madam.” She's a little shocked but figures that’s not so bad. When her two daughters get home from school, the bird sees them and says, “New house, new madam, new girls.” The woman is surprised, but she figures the parrot will straighten out once it figures out who everybody is. A little while later, the woman’s husband, Frank, comes home from work. As he walks in the door, the bird says: “Hi Frank.”

Anonymous
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