Twinkle Toes

Q: Why did the farmer take his cow dancing?
A: He was in the mood for a milkshake.

K9 Punishment

Three dogs are sitting in the waiting room of a vets office. One is a poodle, one is a schnauzer and the other is a great Dane.  The poodle turns to the schnauzer and asks "why are you here?"  The schnauzer responds, "I'm 17 years old. I don't see or hear very well.  I've been having accidents in the house. My owner says I'm too old and sick so he brought me here to be put to sleep." 
The schnauzer asks the poodle "why are you here?"  The poodle responds, "I've not been myself lately. I've been especially high strung. I've been barking all the time, I've been snapping at people and I even bit one of the neighbor's kids. Nobody knows why this has been happening. My owner says he can't risk me biting somebody else so he brought me here to be put to sleep."
The poodle and schnauzer ask the great Dane why he is here. The great Dane responds, "My owner is this beautiful runway model. Yesterday she was walking around the house naked when she suddenly bent down to pickup something she dropped. She was bent over and naked when nature took over and the next thing I know I'm on top of her doing the doggie thing. I couldn't help myself. "  The poodle asks, "so she brought you here to put to sleep?"  "Oh, no...., I'm just here to get my nails trimmed."

Be Sure and Pack

Q: What animals were last to leave the ark?
A: The elephants as they had to pack their trunks!