Scooby Doobie Boobies!

A flat-chested young lady goes to Dr. Smith for advice about breast enlargements. He tells her, "Every day when you get out of the shower, rub the top of your breasts and say, 'Scooby dooby doobies, I want bigger boobies.'" She did this every day faithfully and after several months, it worked! She grew great boobs! One morning she was running late and she was on the bus when she realized she had forgotten her morning ritual. At this point she loved her new boobs and didn't want to lose them, so she got up right in the middle of the bus and said, "Scooby dooby doobies, I want bigger boobies!" A guy sitting nearby asked her, "Do you go to Dr. Smith by any chance?" "Why, yes, I do. How did you know?" "Hickory dickory dock"!

Can't Trust Them

Q: How do you know you can't trust doctors and lawyers?
A: Because they both "practice" their professions.

Docs Go To Heaven

Three doctors died and went to the Pearly Gates to be interviewed to see where they would end up. St. Peter asked the first one what he did on earth, and he said he was an obstetrician. St. Peter asked what an obstetrician did and the doc told him. "Sounds pretty good; okay you can go in to Heaven." The second doc said he was a pediatrician and had to explain what that involved. St. Peter said, "Sounds very useful, very good -- you can go in too." The third doc said he was the chief man in charge of a whole HMO conglomerate. "Well, what's that?" asked St. Peter. So the doc told him exactly what that involved. "Sounds very important, very useful. You can go in too." So the third doc goes in the Gates and starts to walk up the stairs. St. Peter turns and calls after him, "Oh, by the way, you can only stay three days."