Looking Im-potent.

This guy goes to the doctor for a vasectomy. Unlike the usual patients, he shows up in a limo, and he's sitting in the doctor's office in a rented tuxedo with black tie. The doctor says, "I've done a lot of these, but I've never seen a limo and tuxedo before. What's the story?" To which the fellow responds, "If I'm gonna BE im-potent, I'm gonna LOOK im-potent!"

Unlucky Traveling Salesman

Seems that the traveling salesman was driving in the country and his car broke down. He hiked several miles to a farm house, and asked the farmer if there was a place he could stay over night. "Sure," said the farmer, "my wife died several years ago, and my two daughters are 21 and 23, but they're off to college, and I'm all by my self, so I have lots of room to put you up." Hearing this, the salesman turned around and started walking back towards the highway, and the farmer called after him, "Didn't you hear what I said? I have lots of room." "I heard you," said the salesman, "but I think I'm in the wrong joke."

Is a Lawyer Well Hung?

Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung?
A: You can't get a finger between the rope and his neck!