Word Play Jokes - Private Parts

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Little Johnny is Fascinated

A teacher asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence.
Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating." The teacher said, "That was good, Mary, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'"
Sally raised her hand and said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated." The teacher said, "Good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'"
Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was notorious for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate," so she called on him. Johnny said loudly, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons." The teacher said, "That was good, Johnny. However, you did not use the word 'fascinate' in your sentence." Little Johnny continued, "But her boobs are so big, she can only fasten eight!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

No Pants

A man is walking down the street, when he notices that his grandfather is sitting on the porch in a rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down. "Grandpa, what are you doing?" the man exclaims. The old man looks off in the distance and does not answer his grandson. "Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asks again. The old man slyly looks at him and says, "Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This was your Grandma's idea!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Sure I Can

There was a farmer, sitting on the front porch of his house this one hot summer day, when this kid comes walking down the road carrying a big bundle of wire. "Hey kid!" the farmer says. "Where ya goin' with that wire?" "Well," the kid drawls, "this here ain't just any ol' wire, this here's chicken wire - I'm fixin' to catch me some chickens!" "You can't catch chickens with chicken wire!" "Sure I can!" the kid says, and takes off down the road. He comes back at the end of the day and sure enough, he's got a whole mess of chickens caught in his chicken wire. Well, the farmer's sitting on his porch the next day, and the same kid comes walking down the lane, carrying a big roll of tape. "Hey kid!" the farmer yells. "Where ya goin' with that tape?" "Well, this here ain't just any ol' tape, this here's duck tape - I'm fixin' to catch me some ducks!" "You can't catch ducks with duck tape!" the farmer yells back. "Sure I can!" the kid says, and takes off down the road. He comes back at the end of the day and again, the farmer can't believe his eyes. The kid had a whole bunch of ducks all wrapped up tightly in his tape. The next day the farmer's sitting on his porch again, and the kid comes walking down the road carrying a stick. "Hey kid!" the farmer says. "Where ya goin' with that stick?" "Well, this here ain't just any old stick, this here's pussy willow." "Hang on," the farmer says, "I'll get my hat."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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