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Word Play Jokes - Private Parts
Gardening Women
Two women are digging in the garden. One pulls out a foot- long carrot. She says, "This one reminds me of my husband." The second woman says, "Your husband's is that long?" "No - that dirty."
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Job For Mom
In the old country, it is a custom for women to enter virginal and sexually ignorant into marriages arranged by their parents. In one particular case, an attractive young maid, from a very poor family was wed to a well-off, but relatively unattractive businessman. When the wedding night finally came, the couple, at the bride's insistence, stayed in a hotel near her families home. Early in the evening, the bride came rushing through the door. "Mother, Mother!" cried the girl, "He says that we should sleep together!" "It's alright, girl, married people sleep together. Now go back before he starts to worry about you." "Oh," said the girl, and returned to her husband who had already begun to disrobe. When she saw his hairy chest, she went running back to her mother. "Mother, Mother, he is taking off his clothes, and he is covered in hair!" "It's alright girl, men have hair on their bodies, don't let it bother you... Now, get back their before he starts wondering about you." When she returns, she finds the man naked for the first time, and sees that he had part of his right foot amputated. She flees, in fright, back to mom. "Mother, mother, he only has a foot and a half!" "Stand back, girl!" says the mother, "This is a job for a real woman!"
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Golf Balls!
Ok, this idiot of the first order is invited for a game of golf for the first time, while in another country. He's totally enamoured with the golf ball because he's never seen anything like it before so he carries like, 30 of them back home to give away as souvenirs. While passing through the customs on his way back, the customs officer, who's perhaps a bigger idiot than this guy, notices his pockets bulging with all these golf balls and can't figure it out. So he asks our man, "What the hell is all this?!" To which he replies, "Oh they're just golf balls." So the customs officer goes, "Oh oh! You mean like tennis elbow?"
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