Car In A Ditch

A man is driving down the road and notices a car in the ditch. He doesn't usually help many people so he drives on by. Then he notices that a pretty woman is the driver so he goes back to help. As he is hooking his truck to her car he says, "You know, you are the first pregnant woman I've ever helped out of a ditch". "But I'm not pregnant," she says. "Well you're not out of the ditch yet," he says.

Forgetful Chicken

Q: Why did the forgetful chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the other side -- er, no -- to go shopping -- no, not that either -- damn it.

Calling Roll in School

There was a little girl named Fufu. She went to school one day and her teacher said, "How do you spell your name?" The girl replied, "F.U. - F.U." Her teacher sent her to the principal's office. She got to the principal's office and he said, "First off, how do you spell your name?" She said, "F.U. - F.U." He said, "YOU ARE SUSPENDED!"