Robot Sex

Q: What do you call a robot whose sole purpose is to have one-night stands?
A: Nuts and bolts

Apple Users

People who use Apple products are constantly reminding you that they use Apple products.
Sent from my iPhone.

iSwat

I was visiting my son and daughter-in-law last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper. "This is the 21st century, old man," he said. "We don’t waste money on newspapers. Here, you can borrow my iPad."
I can tell you, that fly never knew what hit it…