Kentucky Redneck and Ohio Buckeye

A Kentucky redneck and an Ohio buckeye are night fishing on their respective sides of the Ohio River. As soon as the redneck puts his line in the water, he slings a fish onto the bank. The buckeye isn't catching anything, so he yells across to the redneck, "Buddy, I'd sure like to be on your side of the river!" "Alright, tell ya what -- I'll shine my flashlight 'cross this river, and you can walk across this little beam of light!" the redneck yells back. The buckeye replies, "Ain't no way, buddy. You must think I'm a fool. I know when I get halfway 'cross, you'll turn your flashlight off!"

Longest Years

Q: What are the longest three years of a Duke player's life?
A: His freshman year.

The Biker's Decision.

You'd never believe it, but I bumped into a famous stuntman in a motorcycle shop the other day.  He was complaining because he couldn't decide whether to buy a bike with a high top speed but poor acceleration, or one with lots of torque and a fast acceleration but a poor top speed.  Eventually he decided on the second one because it cost a lot less.  After all... torque is cheap.