Flavored condoms

I recently tried some of these new 'flavored' condoms. I bought one of each flavor they had, and tried each one in turn every time i got a shag. My girlfriend likes to lick each one before i insert it in her, just to see what flavor i was wearing. The first night she said "Mmmmm, Cherry flavor", The second night she said "Mmmmm, Mint flavor ", The third night she said "Mmmmm, Strawberry flavor", and so on, until we had reached the final flavor, and she said "Mmmmm, Cheese flavor" "Cheese flavour ??" i said "I haven't put one on yet!"

The Shopping Cart

Q: Why did God invent the shopping cart?
A: To teach the women to walk on their hind legs!

Got Lentils?

Q: What is the difference between a Chickpea and a Lentil? 
A: I've never had a Lentil on my chest.