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Extra Extra Organs
John Hopkins Medical Center is reporting an unusual occurrence in the Obstetrics department: A child was born with both male and female organs.
A penis and a brain!
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Dumb Blond
One day three blondes were walking down the beach when they saw that something had washed up on the beach. The first blonde shouts, "Look it's a dinosaur!" The second blonde says, "No stupid. It's the Titanic. Duh." The third blonde chuckles. "You're both dumb. It's obviously a genie in a bottle." So she proceeds to pick up the bottle and rub it. Sure enough! A genie pops out! The genie stretched and looks around to find the three blondes. "Normally," the genie said, "I would grant three wishes, but since there are three of you, you each get one wish." The first blonde steps forward. "Okay, I don't like being a dumb blonde so I want to be 50% smarter." The genie bobs his head and says, "Done." He turns her into a brunette. The second blonde says, "I don't like being a dumb blonde either so I want to be 100% smarter!" The genie turns her into a redhead. The last blonde ponders her wish for a moment and finally says, "I LIKE being a dumb blonde. I want to be 100% dumber." The genie turns her into a man.
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Schedule of a Man
A MAN'S SCHEDULE
1. Get up.
2. Pass gas.
3. Drink cup of black coffee.
4. Pass gas.
5. Dress, skipping shower because "alarm didn't work".
6. Pass gas.
7. Log on to computer to check porn site before leaving for work. Pass gas while "enjoying" favorite site.
8. Drive to work. Pass gas at stop light. Open window to air out car.
9. Get to work at MacDonalds. Pass gas in bathroom (for all patrons to enjoy). Forget to wash hands.
10. Lunch. Double cheesy cheeseburger and supersized fries. Pass gas.
11. Arrive home. Pass gas. Have a beer. Pass gas.
12. Tell wife you want sex. Belch. Finish early, belch and fall asleep.
13. Get up at 3 A.M. waking wife but instead of finishing her off, return to computer to talk in the chat rooms - imagining what a stud you are, chatting with all those "gorgeous women" online. Pass gas.
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