What Can I Get?

A man walks into a pharmacy and goes to the counter. Standing behind the counter is a young woman. "May I speak to the pharmacist?" he asks. "Well," she replies, "I am the pharmacist." He looks very uncomfortable, and asks for a *male* pharmacist, as he has a "male problem." She informs him that only she and her sister work at this particular establishment. He blushes and says, "Well, I really do need help, so I guess I'll ask you... I have a problem. I have a constant erection, and nothing I do seems to get rid of it. It's been like this for three months now. Can you give me anything for it?" The woman looks thoughtful, and says, "Hold on, I'll go in back and ask my sister." After a couple of minutes she returns and says, "We'll give you half of the business and it's profits, but that's all we can give you for it..."

Office Baby

One of the girls in the office where I work is going to be having a baby.
I just haven't decided which one yet.

Divorced and Board

These two guys had each recently divorced and they swore they would never have anything to do with women again. They were best friends and they decided to move up to Alaska as far north as they could go and never look at a woman again.  As soon as they arrived, they went into a trader's store and told the owner, "Give us enough supplies to last two men for one year." The trader got the gear together and on top of each one's supplies he laid a board with a hole in it with fur around the hole. Curiously, they asked,  "What's that board for?".  The trader said, "Well, where you're going there are no women and you might need this."  They said "No way! We've sworn off women for life!" The trader said, "Well, take the boards with you and if you don't use them I'll refund your money next year".   "Okay", they said and left.
Next year this guy came into the trader's store and said "Give me enough supplies to last one man for one year." The trader said, "Weren't you in here last year with a partner?".  "Yeah", said the guy.  "Where is he?", asked the trader.  "I shot him", said the guy.  "Why?", the owner asked quickly.  "I caught him in bed with my board."