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Sex Jokes - Private Parts
Camo Test
During camouflage training in Louisiana, a private disguised as a tree trunk had made a sudden move that was spotted by a visiting general. "You simpleton!" the officer barked. "Don't you know that by jumping and yelling the way you did, you could have endangered the lives of the entire company?" "Yes sir," the solder answered apologetically. "But, if I may say so, I did stand still when a flock of pigeons used me for target practice. And I never moved a muscle when a large dog peed on my lower branches. But when two squirrels ran up my pants leg and I heard the big one say, "Let's eat one now and save the other until winter' --- that did it!"
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Sunbathing
A wealthy young Wall Street stockbroker was admiring his physique nude before the mirror one day. The picture was perfectly toned and buffed except for the lack of a tan. So, he flew to California for the weekend to get a tan. Back in his luxurious New York condo, he stripped bare to get another look at his own great beauty. He was shocked to see that he had a little white triangle in a strategic location. Well, that just wouldn't do! The next weekend, he flew back to his favorite beach in California. He found a secluded, quiet spot and stripped off his attire and laid down on the sand. Then he proceeded to cover up all his body with the sand, except for the part that was a tiny white triangle. He soon relaxed and fell asleep. While he napped, two elderly ladies came slowly along the water's edge, clinging to each other and their canes for support. When they saw the strange thing planted in the sand, one lady turned to the other and said, "Eloise, when I was 20, I was scared of it. When I was 40, I couldn't get enough of it. When I was 60, I had to pay for it, and now that I'm 80, I find it growing wild!"
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Two Hookers
Two hookers were on a street corner. They started discussing business, and one of the hookers said, "Gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air." The other hooker looked at her and said, "No, I just burped."
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