Pros And Cons of A Threesome

Pros and cons of a threesome
Advantages

• It can get really weird
• Someone can go for beer without interrupting the proceedings
• There's always a hand or mouth free when you need one
• Motel rooms split 3 ways are only $13
• You get to watch your best friends making love
•  You get to get watched making love
• Simultaneously enjoying intercourse and oral sex has to be experienced to be believed
• You get strange looks when you all go out dancing
• You get really strange looks when you all go out comparison shopping for condoms
• Enough people to play gin rummy if things don't work out
• You can safely check yourself for any homosexual tendencies without actually doing anything about it
• Calling out the wrong name during climax isn't as much of a problem, the "wrong name" is probably the one on your left
• Three-person showers are fantastic
• Three-person naked belly laughs are even better
• Three-person kisses are best

• It can get really weird
• Tougher for three people to decide on pizza toppings
• Simultaneous orgasms are even trickier to pull off
• You may harbor paranoid thoughts that while you're in the bathroom; the other two are giggling over the pimple on your butt
• Trying to find safe places to put your elbows
• You get to find out what kind of really sick things your friends like
• Queen-sized beds are suddenly smaller than you remember them
• Trying to fit 3 names in the little heart when drawing on your notebooks
• Morning breath multiplied by 3
• You might discover homosexual tendencies you didn't suspect or want
• You might discover homosexual tendencies in one of your friends you didn't suspect or want
• You have the option of wrecking twice the normal number of relationships
• The odds of boyfriends/spouses walking in on you triple
• Sorting clothes quickly when the significant other walks in assumes comical proportions
• Now there are two wet spots to avoid.

Crushing a Man's Ego

30 Things Never to Say to a Naked Man...
1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahhhh, it's cute.
3. Why don't we just cuddle?
4. You know they have surgery to fix that.
5. Make it dance.
6. Can I paint a smiley face on it?
7. Wow, and your feet are so big.
8. It's OK, we'll work around it.
9. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
10. Oh no... a flash headache.
11. (giggle and point)
12. Can I be honest with you?
13. How sweet, you brought incense.
14. This explains your car.
15. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
16. Why is God punishing me?
17. At least this won't take long.
18. I never saw one like that before.
19. But it still works, right?
20. It looks so unused.
21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
22. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
23. Are you cold?
24. If you get me real drunk first.
25. Is that an optical illusion?
26. What is that?
27. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.
28. Does it come with an air pump?
29. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.
30. I guess this makes me the 'early bird'.

Blind Man in the Fish Store

Q: What did the blind man say in front of the fish store?
A: "Hi Ladies"