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Sex Jokes
Creative Sex!
Morris complained to his friend Irving, that love making with his wife was becoming routine and boring. "Get creative Morris. Break up the monotony. Why don't you try 'playing doctor' for an hour? That's what I do," said Irving. "Sounds great," Morris replied, "but how do you make it last for an hour?" "That's easy...just keep her in the waiting room for 59 minutes!"
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An Irresolvable Problem
A woman went to a podiatrist complaining that her feet always hurt. He immediately noticed that she was extremely bowlegged. "Have you always been that way?" asked the podiatrist. "No," she said, not until recently. "I've been fucking a lot doggie style." "Well," said the podiatrist, "you are going to have to stop." "I can't," she replied, "that's the only way my German Shepherd fucks."
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Public Statement by the Rev. Jesse Jackson
Due to the great consternation caused by the revelation of my act of procreation, I accept my obligation to give an explanation to the population for my act of copulation. I gave in to temptation, for the anticipation of sexual gratification, that I could not obtain through masturbation, resulted in my fornication. I accepted her invitation, and provided her with excitation, stimulation, penetration, replication, and liberation. She provided lubrication (to avoid inflammation) and I wore condoms to avoid contamination. She cried for duplication, but I insisted upon termination, in spite her fascination with variation. This has caused me great aggravation, and the agitation and provocation of the media has resulted in my humiliation, denigration, and degradation. My wife is considering castration, which would require my hospitalization. Pray that this matter will find culmination in my sanctification and rehabilitation so that my plans for nomination to my ultimate vocation will not result in revocation and termination. I hope this proclamation has provided illumination and verification and will prohibit further provocation.
Sincerely, The Rev. Jesse Jackson
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