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3 Times a Virgin

A woman had been married three times and was still a virgin. Somebody asked her how that could be possible. "Well," she said. "The first time I married an octogenarian and he died before we could consummate the marriage." "The second time I married a naval officer and war broke out on our wedding day." "The third time I married a Microsoft Windows programmer and he just sat on the edge of the bed and kept telling me how good it was going to be."

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Anonymous

Hooker's Two Cents

One day Bill Clinton decides to go on a jog. While jogging he sees a hooker on the street corner and she says "Five bucks for a blowjob." Bill says, "I'll give you two dollars." The hooker says no and Bill shrugs and continues jogging. The next day he goes for another jog and sees the same hooker. Again she says "Five bucks for a blowjob," but Bill says "no, $2." She says no and Bill laughs and keeps jogging. The next day, Hillary goes with Bill on his jog and he passes hooker once again. The hooker looks over at Hillary and says, "You see what you get for two bucks?"

Anonymous

In Jail

This exchange was overheard between the separated sections of the jail. A male voice yells over to the female side: "I got 12 inches over here you would love to have." The female response was: "Well, spit it out it isn't yours."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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