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Sex Jokes - Denied Sex Jokes
3 Times a Virgin
A woman had been married three times and was still a virgin. Somebody asked her how that could be possible. "Well," she said. "The first time I married an octogenarian and he died before we could consummate the marriage." "The second time I married a naval officer and war broke out on our wedding day." "The third time I married a Microsoft Windows programmer and he just sat on the edge of the bed and kept telling me how good it was going to be."
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Fowl Rooster
Q: Why was the rooster so unhappy?
A: Because he only got laid once and it was by his mother.
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A Woman Comes Home
A woman comes home from the doctor and tells her husband the bad news that she has only 18 hours to live. "That's terrible!" said her husband, "What would you like to do during your last hours? I'll try to make it as memorable as possible for you."
"Well," she said, "First, I want to take a long romantic walk, then have a quiet dinner at my favorite restaurant and then go to bed with you and make passionate love all night long!"
"Gee, Honey." said her husband, "I don't know about that 'all night long' stuff. After all, I'm gonna have to get up in the morning and you won't"
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