Sex Jokes

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The Big Horse Race

The Big Horse Race Horses in the race are:
1. Passionate Lady
2. Bare Belly
3. Silk Panties
4. Conscience
5. Jockey Shorts
6. Clean Sheets
7. Thighs
8. Big Johnson
9. Heavy Bosom
10. Merry Cherry
At the Post: They're off! Conscience is left behind at the post. Jockey Shorts and Silk Panties are off in a hurry. Heavy Bosom is being pressured. Passionate lady is caught between Thighs and Big Johnson in a very tight spot. At the Halfway Mark it's Bare Belly on top. Thighs opens up and Big Johnson is pressed in. Heavy Bosom is being pushed hard against Clean Sheets. Passionate Lady and Thighs are working hard on Bare Belly. Bare Belly is under terrific pressure from Big Johnson. At The Stretch Merry Cherry cracks under the strain. Big Johnson is making a final drive. Passionate Lady is coming. At The Finish It's Big Johnson giving everything he's got and Passionate Lady takes everything Big Johnson has to offer. It looks like a dead heat but Big Johnson squirts through and wins by a head. Heavy Bosom weakens and Thighs pulls-up. Clean Sheets never had a chance.

Categories: Sex Jokes , Animal Jokes (Horse Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Snow White

Q: What did Snow White say when she sat on Pinoccio's nose?
A: "Tell a lie."

Categories: Sex Jokes (Masturbation Jokes) , Riddles
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Back Yard

A husband and wife were in their back yard when he was noticed her expanding backside. He commented, "Boy, your ass is getting big. Almost as big as the gas grill here."
She angrily stomped across the yard, and he followed saying, "Yep, that thing is getting huge." At this, the wife retreated to the far side of the yard. Soon he approached with a tapemeasure, acquired the width, and exclaimed, "It IS as big as the gas grill!"
Later that night when they were in bed, the husband started making moves on his wife. She just turned away. "C'mon, honey," he said, "what's wrong?"
Her cold reply was, "I'm not firing up this grill for just one little weiner!"

Categories: Insult Jokes (Fat Insult Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Denied Sex Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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