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Religion Jokes - Nun / Priest Jokes
Nun Attacked by Gorilla
Three nun's were touring the local zoo one sunny afternoon having a picnic. While wandering around, they entered the monkey house. Unfortunately, one of the nuns got to close to the gorilla cage and he pulled her inside. He savagely beat and raped the nun. It took 4 guards to pull the nun to safety. The nun spent three months in the hospital recovering and then was sent to a convent in England, for six months, to recover emotionally. Amazingly, the same three nuns met up again the next year in the park. The younger of the two asked her if she minded talking about the experience in the zoo. She said, "Of course not". The younger nun asked "Did it hurt?" The sister replied "Of course! He never called and he never wrote."
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Marrying A Man
Q: What do you call a man that marries another man?
A: A minister
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Shy Priest
A shy priest greets the wedding guests at the Church. He's very nervous and doesn't say much. As the Bride and Groom approach the altar the priest steps up and gives the best homily anyone has ever heard. He's full of confidence, incredibly expressive and has everyone in fits of laughter!
After the vows, the priest is again extremely shy and barely says a word to anyone. The groom approaches the him and asks, "Why are you so shy? You seemed like a different person when you were giving that homily!"
"I know..." Says the priest, "But that was just my altar ego."
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