Bedtime Prayers

A little boy was kneeling beside his bed with his mother and grandmother and softly saying his prayers, "Dear God, please bless Mummy and Daddy and all the family and please give me a good night's sleep." Suddenly he looked up and shouted, "And don't forget to give me a bicycle for my birthday!!" "There is no need to shout like that," said his mother. "God isn't deaf." "No," said the little boy, "but Grandma is."

Views of the Grand Canyon

Three people were visiting and viewing the Grand Canyon -- an artist, a pastor and a cowboy. As they stood on the edge of that massive abyss, each one responded with a cry of exclamation. The artist said, "Ah, what a beautiful scene to paint!" The minister cried, "What a wonderful example of the handiwork of God!" The cowboy mused, "What a terrible place to lose a cow!"

Church Parrot

There once was a man that had five daughters their names are Char-relle, Zion, Keedie, Bria and Alexis. The man was called by God to a build a church. All five of his daughters suggested to him that he should make his church different from any other church. So he set out on a mission. He came to a animal store and ask to see a parrot. The lady said that the parrot can only be taught one thing to say. So he taught the parrot to say "open the door, open it wide and let the sinners come inside." The man and his daughters built the church and put the parrot by the door, and every time that someone came in he would say his line. One day a bum came in and the parrot said, "open the door, open it wide and let the sinners come inside." So the bum got kind of offended and said "What did you just say to me?!!" The parrot repeat his sentence, "Open the door, open wide and let the sinners come inside." Then the bum said, "If you say that to me one more time I will throw this rock at you." Without hesitation the parrot repeated what he was taught. Then suddenly the bum threw the rock at the bird and the bird said, "Close the door, close it quickly this stupid fool done threw a brick!"