Religion Jokes

Extreme Uber

A Muslim Extremist orders an Uber. His uber driver arrives so he gets in the car and then asks the driver a question.
Extremist: in the time of Muhammad did they have radio?
Driver: no.
Extremist: so why do you have the radio on?
Driver: turns off radio
The extremist then asks another question:
Extremist: in the time of Muhammad did they have air conditioning?
Driver: no.
Extremist: so why are you using it?
Driver: turns of the air conditioner
The driver decided to ask the extremist a question.
Driver: in the time of Muhammad did they have Uber?
Extremist: obviously not.
Driver: then get the fuck out!

Anonymous

God being Man

Q: How do we know that God is a man?
A: Because if God was a woman, sperm would taste like chocolate.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Soap Dispenser

Two priests are off to the showers late one night. They undress and step in the showers before they realize there is no soap. Father John says he has some soap in his room and goes to get it, not bothering to dress. He grabs two bars of soap in his hands and heads back to the showers. He gets halfway down the hall when he sees three nuns heading his way. Having no place to hide, he stands against the wall and freezes like he's a statue. The nuns stop and comment on how life-like he looks. The first nun suddenly reaches out and pulls his dick. Startled, he drops a bar of soap. "Oh look," says the 2nd nun... "A soap dispenser." To test her theory she also pulls his dick... and sure enough he drops the last bar of soap. The third nun then pulls, first once, then twice and three times. Still nothing happens. So she tries once more and to her delight she yells... "Look, hand cream!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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